Passion and Criticism

The dichotomy of life is such that no one knows us truly, and it is okay. Not even we know ourselves truly. Our fears, desires, and fantasies are all hidden deep under the veil of comfort and socially acceptable behavior. They only move their ugly head in times of discomfort and pain, and that's precisely what separates good and bad people. Everyone can be good in a happy situation, but it's the behavior shown during times of stress and discomfort that matters. Quite often, most of us don't know exactly what we are truly capable of, both good and bad. As the situation evolves, our understanding of our own behavior also evolves, and that's why they say, give weak men power and you'll see them destroy everything around themselves.

And you know what, it is good that we don't know ourselves truly, because if we do, then most scientific, artistic, and materialistic pursuits will cease. The fact that we don't know ourselves keeps us on our toes and makes us try new things. And in this process of serendipity, we often find our passion or love. Fortunate are those who have passion in their lives, and it is not very different from love. As some shaayar said once: 

"Kuch ishq kiya, kuch kaam kiya, 

wo log bohot khush qismet the, 

jo ishq ko kaam samjhte the 

ya kaam see Aashiqui krte the, 

hum jeete jee masroof rahe aur 

aakhir mein humne tang aake 

dono ko adhoora chodd diya."

Rarely do I see people whose eyes shine when they talk about their passion, the rest are just in escape mode, devoid of real love and excitement. For them, every moment is just a struggle or time pass at best. They are not looking forward to anything, except escaping their present lives. They watch movies, but they don't understand cinema, they attend concerts, but they don't understand music, they buy expensive clothes but they don't understand design.

And that is how the world is and will always be, only the blessed ones will be able to find peace and love. Rest will just keep passing time in dissatisfaction. And it is not that people who have art or love in their lives don't suffer or are not dissatisfied. Their suffering is of a different kind, they suffer even more than the regular folks, but in that suffering only they transform themselves and in turn create something beautiful for themselves and the world.

I talk to a whole lot of people, and everyone has their own perspective about me. And their perspective is not wrong, it is just incomplete, the truth lies somewhere in between. I used the word dichotomy at the start because that's how my life has been for a very long time. There are groups, where I'm appreciated for my knowledge and in others ridiculed. If I record my conversation with these groups and play it with the other group, they won't even recognize me. Both groups with their own set of judgments. I truly enjoy both meaningless banter, gossip, and deep intellectual conversation. But there is one caveat, meaningless banter or gossip should elicit some laughs or help me better understand human behavior.

We are all kaleidoscopes in others' eyes - appearing differently to each observer. Some see me as a mentor, others as a storyteller, and still others might dismiss me as a showoff. These perceptions say as much about the observers as they do about me. We all engage in this kind of projection, filtering others through the lens of our own experiences and biases.

It's natural and even necessary to create these mental shortcuts. Given our limited cognitive resources, we rely on generalizations to navigate the complexity of human relationships. The key is to hold these generalizations lightly, acknowledging their limitations and remaining humble when they fail to capture the full picture.

Your peace of mind shouldn't hinge on others' judgments, especially from those who haven't done the hard work of self-reflection. Consider the source: those constantly seeking validation through social media likes are rarely equipped to evaluate your character. Instead, seek guidance from those who demonstrate humility and rationality, whose feedback stems from genuine care rather than a desire to mold you into their ideological framework.

True self-awareness is rare. While almost everyone claims honesty as a virtue, few readily acknowledge their own shortcomings. The most valuable insights often come from those rare individuals who can admit their flaws - they're the ones whose guidance is worth heeding, as they speak from a place of genuine understanding rather than a need to categorize or control.

I personally know a few people who are quite honest, but even they are not quite aware of their own situation. The simple fact is that most likely they lack the tools for self-reflection, or never came across tragedy. You should listen patiently to people who criticize you out of goodness, but still keep your common sense and choose only what you think might help.

The most interesting thing is that people who know you the least are the most judgemental, the same lot who will keep beating the drum of 'you shouldn't generalize'. 100 people, 100 opinions, choose your path wisely. Everyone is different, and that's what makes life interesting. But that doesn't mean people should do any random thing, walking the path of serendipity and the joy of discovery is something everyone should strive towards. 

I don't know what you like, probably even you don't know what you like. But at least walk a few miles to discover your passion or love. In a society that keeps writing songs on love, in a society that is obsessed with cinema, at least try to find love or create your own story by walking the path of serendipity. 

PS: Love is far beyond relationships, not to be confused with fun or the act of doing things together.