Random Thoughts

There is a lot that people don't understand about me, not just because I have complex ideas, but also because they've never experienced life the way I have. They haven't been in similar situations. By the time I finished my bachelor's, I had transformed into a full-blown extrovert. I spent more time outside my room than in it, even if I included sleeping time to it. My routine involved leaving around 8:30 in the morning and rarely returning before midnight. Most of my time was spent in other people's rooms, to the point where some of the rooms became my temporary napping spots in the afternoon. Life was chaotic for four straight years. Sleeping in different rooms became routine, and luckily, no one ever kicked me out. I had a large group of friends, or rather, I was part of several different groups. Each group taught me something different and had a unique vibe. Some were for having dinner together, others for joking around, and a few precious ones for cherishing tr...

It is a strange feeling, I can't put my finger on it, I don't even know what triggers it. But from time to time it resurfaces, maybe some form of hormonal cycle, something which I'm completely unaware of. It's a strange form of dissatisfaction, even though everything appears to be the same in my mind, there is no change to my schedule, or anything else, yet I feel the void. One possible explanation might be that my brain needs some new form of input, it might be craving for a new experience. But fortunately, just the way it comes, it automatically goes away as well. Recently during my visit to Germany, I felt the same. There was no tension or stress, I was chilling beside a river on a sunny day, enjoying my coffee, and yet I didn't like it. People don't understand what solitude is, they don't know what it means to be alone. Please don't get me wrong, I enjoy my solitude, I always have so many things to entertain myself with, so many things to explore, ob...