Current India and Indians have a big problem

Don't get me wrong—India is one of the most interesting places on earth. With its rich history, culture, and identity, few places in the world can offer a more rich and diverse experience. Some things and practices have literally survived for thousands of years. In Kerala, we still have practices that have been done since the Vedas, at least 5000 BC. I don't think any other culture has a more vivid landscape, seasons, foods, festivals, and spiritual practices.

When I moved to the West for the first time, I was surprised to know that people didn't know that India has six seasons, an unheard-of thing for most Westerners. From our own calendar to rituals for even the most basic things, like taking the newly bought car to a temple, or even a space probe by scientists of ISRO. 

Among all the diverse groups of people I've had the privilege of interacting with, I've observed that reconciling God and Science seems elusive for most. Indians, however, stand out as a group capable of being both deeply scientific and deeply devout. A shining example of this harmony is the legendary mathematician, Srinivasan Ramanujan.

This isn’t to say that there are no believer-scientists in the West, but their numbers are relatively fewer, and their belief is often private or treated as an abstract concept rather than a profound, personal connection. For Indians, however, the divine isn't merely an idea—it is a living, breathing deity.

Interestingly, many—including Indians themselves—fail to grasp the distinction between a god and a deity. A deity, in Indian tradition, is as alive and personified as any human being, complete with the ability to participate in legal and social frameworks. For instance, in the Ram Janmabhoomi court case, Ram Lalla (the infant deity form of Lord Rama) was officially recognized as a party in the proceedings. This encapsulates the unique relationship Indians have with their deities, one that intertwines faith with tangible, everyday reality.

It’s unfortunate that when many Indians interact with Westerners, they often reduce India to Bollywood movies and a handful of popular dishes. Let me be blunt: India is not Bollywood. In fact, the lives of Bollywood stars are worlds apart from those of the average Indian. As for food, it’s not just Butter Chicken Masala and Naan bread. Indian cuisine is incredibly diverse, with each state offering unique flavors, dishes, and culinary traditions.

I could easily write an entire book on the stark differences between the East and the West. Having lived and observed European life up close for years, I can confidently state that almost every aspect of life differs between the two. From the way we view relationships, family, and community to something as seemingly basic as personal hygiene—yes, even how we clean ourselves—India and Europe are poles apart. Beyond the shared basic needs, there’s little overlap.

Now, let me turn to an issue closer to home: the troubling mindset of a specific class of Indians, particularly those I often interact with—your average engineering or MBA graduate. Moderately educated individuals, often pretentious and showy, lacking any depth. The ones who live outside India are even worse, they start hating India even more, by stating trivial things, like too many people, etc, but never look inside themselves for the real corruption.

Let’s start with some recent news: people spending ₹1 lakh on Coldplay concert tickets. Sure, a handful might genuinely love Coldplay, having grown up with their music. But for the majority, it’s just another status symbol—a way to brag. Let’s face it: Coldplay was not a cultural staple for most of us growing up. Yet now, attending their concert has become a “cool” thing to do.

Here’s a simple litmus test: if these people were forbidden from posting about the concert or discussing it with friends, most wouldn’t even bother going, even if tickets were much cheaper. There’s a world of difference between attending a concert because you genuinely love the music and going just to show off and pretend you do. Sadly, the latter seems to dominate the frenzy.

This mindset isn’t limited to concerts. I personally know people buying iPhones and other expensive items far beyond their financial means. Indians, unsurprisingly, are the largest buyers of first-hand copies in the world. Everything has become about projecting an image, particularly for the middle class, which has recently tasted financial mobility.

Ask your friends why they need an iPhone, and the most common answer is, “It has a great camera.” While that might be true, almost none of them knows even the basics of photography. It’s all pure showmanship. Whether it’s iPhones or clothes from ZARA, it’s a game of appearances. Ironically, ZARA is one of the cheapest brands in the West, but here, it’s elevated purely by perception.

Worse still, this obsession with appearances comes at the expense of our cultural identity. I’m confident that 90% of my friends can’t quote a single Sanskrit shloka. They have no understanding of India’s spiritual heritage. Forget that—they can’t even name the six schools of Hindu philosophy. But ask them about foreign football clubs, and a few “cool” ones will happily rattle off names. I have no issue with global knowledge, but not at the cost of our own roots.

We still equate English with elitism. People actively judge others based on their English proficiency. Our court proceedings are conducted in English, even for someone whose native language is Marathi. The system is rotten at its core. I often jokingly call us "Macaulay's children," but the reality is far from funny. The "brown man complex," the desperate attempt to mimic whiteness, fuels this mindset—and why fairness creams like "Fair and Lovely" sell so well. It’s pathetic.

Most of my so-called educated friends know nothing about India’s history, literature, or poetry. They’ll happily read Harry Potter but won’t touch the Ramayana. They claim they don’t have time, but they seem to have endless hours to scroll through reels. It’s a poison—one we’ve willingly embraced, eroding our identity in the process. 

Providing free internet to young people has been a disaster. Most have become alarmingly shallow in their thinking, leading to a society where individuals like Rajat Dalal are celebrated as heroes, and criminals like those who killed Atul Subhash commit crimes so heinous, they surpass even the gravest acts like rape.

Ask yourself: how many of your friends can analyze a movie scene or break down a music composition, despite binge-watching countless web series, films, and attending expensive concerts? The truth is, they consume cinema without understanding it, and they spend money on concerts without grasping the essence of music.

We churn out millions of graduates every year, yet a significant portion of them have goals like, "Pehli salary se dabake daaru piyunga." What’s gone wrong with our educated class? We have time for everything except cultivating health and wisdom. Many of my friends, in the prime of their youth, can’t even manage a single pull-up. The rise in diabetes and heart disease among young people is alarming, and the convenience of 10-minute delivery services only worsens the problem. Most don’t even know how to cook. Without this basic skill, how can they expect to lead healthy lives?

The situation is even more dire when it comes to young women and fitness. Very few engage in regular gym routines, and playing sports is almost unheard of. Our intellectual conversations in social groups are embarrassingly shallow, often revolving around sex and relationships. Particularly in mixed groups, discussions with women rarely go beyond gossip or trivial topics.

Despite producing a large number of intelligent individuals, the quality of intellectual discourse in India is shockingly low. This is evident from the absence of platforms like Veritasium or 3Blue1Brown. Instead, our focus is entirely on cheap entertainment, showcasing how little value we place on meaningful, thought-provoking content. This obsession with shallow distractions is leading us down a worrying path.

We might be failing in many areas as a society, but there are two things we excel at: memes and arrogance. Let me be blunt—I don’t care about memes. Our poorly educated masses often overestimate their intelligence and scientific temperament. The harsh reality is that most engineering graduates have never read a scientific paper in their lives, let alone understood one. Yet they’ll mock anyone who dares to talk about God or spirituality.

I can confidently say that I can outmatch almost anyone in my social circle in both science and theology. I read 4-5 research papers every week, and I have no trouble comprehending concepts from various religions. But here’s the irony: those who ridicule belief systems have neither the depth in science nor an understanding of faith.

I know I’ve ranted quite a bit, but bear with me—there’s more.

Let’s talk about the unhealthy obsession with cricketers and movie stars. Why are people risking their lives in massive crowds just to watch Pushpa 2? How pathetic is that? I know people who lose their minds over personalities like Virat Kohli, idolizing their discipline and achievements. But if you truly understood the life of an athlete, why the hell are you waking up at 10 AM on weekends and neglecting your own health? Even sports have become nothing more than a trend to fit in with the crowd. I’d wager most people can’t even name five living scientists, and for those championing feminism, you probably can’t name even one living female scientist.

Now onto weddings. By some estimates, Indians spend 30-40% of their life savings on weddings, just to impress a bunch of strangers whose primary purpose seems to be finding fault with the free food. Why do we meddle so much in each other’s affairs? I’ve never encountered a more self-obsessed group of people than Indians. There’s absolutely no justification for squandering such an obscene amount of money on weddings.

And what’s with pre-wedding photoshoots and those insufferable couple channels on Instagram? Why? Why do you feel the need to make other people’s lives miserable with your artificial perfection? Indian marriages are turning into a farce, with unrealistic expectations fueled by these toxic reels. And now, the western trend of casual relationships and multiple partners is creeping into urban India.

But here’s the kicker: most of these people are far from independent by the age of 20. They can’t even wash their own clothes or prepare a basic meal. The West might have a safety net with robust social security, but India doesn’t. This blind mimicry will lead to chaos later in life—public shame, broken lives, and a complete lack of self-reliance. It’s a ticking time bomb, and we’re hurtling toward disaster.

Lastly, relationships. Many of my friends, instead of channeling their energy into personal growth, have spent most of their time chasing the "perfect one." While relationships are undeniably important, building a strong, independent identity should take precedence. I've seen people lose themselves in the endless pursuit of relationships, often making it the sole purpose of their lives. Bollywood certainly deserves some blame for this unhealthy obsession, perpetuating idealized notions of love and companionship.

We interfere excessively in each other's lives, leaving little room for individuality or growth. Social media has only exacerbated the problem with its unrealistic expectations, fostering insecurity and envy. Indian women, in particular, are undergoing a significant phase transition, but not necessarily in a healthy direction. The dating dynamics in India are fraught with issues—imbalanced perceptions, toxicity, and a lack of self-respect in relationships.

This may not sit well with some feminists, but the reality is that modern feminism, while valuable in some respects, often fails to address the struggles of impoverished and marginalized women. Instead, it frequently cultivates toxic ego inflation in many modern women, which hinders genuine equality and mutual respect in relationships. Every Indian guy I have come across has experienced this inflated ego among many Indian women, but I never came across this in the last four years of my life with a Western woman, despite my outright disagreements with them. We must be doing something really wrong. 

In conclusion, we are becoming educated fools—lacking passion for work, life, or purpose. Many of us lead unhealthy lives, whether in relationships, physical well-being, or spirituality. We're overly dependent on external factors, obsessed with impressing random people, and drawn to unnecessary drama and toxicity.

Though I haven't had extensive interactions with the extremely rich or the poor, I suspect their situations aren't significantly better. The worth of a nation can often be gauged by the heroes its people admire. As long as figures like Sachin, Amitabh, and SRK remain the ultimate icons of the masses, it’s clear we are fundamentally misdirected in what we aspire to and value.

The fix is easy, take away social media from young people and limit the usage even for adults. Without books you can never become a smart and intelligent person and most educated Indians sadly prefer tv series and drama over books and knowledge.